They Don’t Mean It, Only Meant It

I couldn’t explain why I was feeling shit but I figured it’s time to fix myself in order to let the right kind of person in. I mean maybe for once somebody genuinely wants to protect my little broken heart.

I’ve learnt to believe that I’d still be on my own in the end, single or not, because nobody is serious now. Or at least it’s really hard to tell if anyone is. Everybody is just looking for anything as long as you don’t have to commit. I’d then rather have something temporary than something semi-permanent (something permanent would be when both parties make it a point to actually put in some fucking effort to try and make it work) but that’s not how I roll. So having to constantly remind myself that everyone I meet now may be real and loves me but it’s all for the moment and will eventually leave me is what that’s been hurting me.

Because people who said they’d be there for you never were. People who say they’d never leave you always do. It’s not their fault and that’s the worst, because they might have really meant what they say.

Just who would have known that they’re going to wake up days after days feeling lesser for you each day? Who could have predicted that they don’t care for you anymore? Maybe they weren’t all lies after all, just short lived truths that you mistakenly believed they are for the long run.

Oops, my bad.

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